BLOCKS
they happen to everyone, I think.
I would say writer's block,
but actually, I've been writing nearly every day without fail.
And yet, lately, I feel anxiety when I think about posting anything that anyone might actually read.
So, in a sense, it's not writer's block, but a sort of energy block-- a self-imposed one, even--- and I don't quite understand it myself.
I'm no psychologist -though I DID play a therapist in a short film--
(If you happen to be interested, I'll paste the link below!)
But anyway, I feel that I've been trying to understand my own strange-self more lately.
When I was younger, I didn't think it was super important to try to figure on what was going on in my head and heart on a daily basis, but as I've gotten older, I feel like it's one of the important parts of self-care...(as much as getting enough exercise each day, and drinking a LOT of water.)
Understanding ones' own self is somewhat deceptively difficult, however. . .
and at the same time, this kind of inner-self-work is one of the keys which I've found to growing as a person.
And as my work is in the acting realm, I feel that this personal work helps me immensely on a professional level as well---- which is a bonus for me I suppose!
-----
Anyway, here's the thing...
just when I start to feel super blocked
the universe sends some kind of weird coincidence my way
that makes me question everything.
-------------
I often frequent this one cafe in Shimokitazawa to meet up with people--
It's actually a place which specializes in ojiya (rice porridge with various toppings)
but I've never actually eaten there--- I've only had various hot drinks
(they make a really nice kinako -roasted soy bean powder- latte)
It's a super cozy spot that sort of feels like being in someone's living room,
toasty warm, and always smelling of delicious home-cooking.
After going there a handful of times, I also realized that they play pretty interesting music.
One day, they played a CD for a second time of a Japanese band which sounded
much like the super obscure folky-rock bands that I listen to...
and then the next time when I went there,
they were playing a CD of really old Disney music, the songs that were in the movies of my childhood, but I'd forgotten about long long ago...
And in mid-conversation, when Candle on the Water from the film "Pete's Dragon" came on, I suddenly found myself totally lost in a personal reverie of sorts.
I think I may have tuned out of the convo for a minute or so-- sorry, friend!
The next couple of times, I went back, they happened to be playing a similar CD--- and I recognized song Someone's Waiting For You from "The Rescuers", and suddenly--
my mind was in a world full of magic
soft around the edges like climbing into the most comfortable bed on a chilly night.
I love when music has this effect.
P.S.
Here are a couple of links...
First, the aforementioned songs-- in reverse order--
which will (hopefully) make your heart a little lighter today!
-and here's the full film, by writer/ director Steve Poole, in which I play a therapist-
