mystery surrounds us, eludes us

A conversation with a friend light years away on the phone the other night:

'Life is really weird, isn't it? You just don't know what tomorrow will bring.'

me:

'Yeah, I suppose, but what's with all the waxing philosophical?'

friend:

'No, really. Think about it. Life is very very strange.'

After I got off the phone, I did indeed have a strange, unexpected night. 

I sometimes forget about the mystery. 

Smiling, winged messengers

thanks.

Waxing 'natsukashii'

natsukashii: nostalgic 

 with the realization that though you can never return to a certain time in your life, 

some bright, Christmas-gift moments in the past are in fact living things 

even

in this moment

Candy Pot
(is this not the best bar name ever?)

a bar just a stone's throw from where I used to live

a bar where Haruki Murakami frequents

and you can understand why

A feeling like you are in the most laid-back living room 

a warmth of comfort
that only jazz can bring

and the best potato salad in the world.

ya-ho!!!!!

that's something like saying 'Marco!' in English

well, YA-HO y'all.

Question for today:

Why do I put things that I really, really want to do on the back burner?

It must have something to do with being afraid of what is going to come out, what's going to emerge.

My creative philosophy is very much in line with something that Haruki Murakami said about how artists are not unlike archaeologists. We dig, we excavate. 

In other words, we have no control over what is extracted from the center of the earth.

Archaeology is in my blood, I think. And yet, I can't deal sometimes with what objects I find. Today, I realized that yes, indeed, my fears are legit. Unearthing things that have been dormant for years and years is, in fact, sometimes frightening when faced in plain sight.

You may have seen this post before. . .

Ok, I've had a few deja-vu moments in the last few days. . .

A few days ago at work, fairly early in the morning, I was reading something on the internet about 'The Magic Flute' and a customer walked in. After she made copies and was paying at the register, I had all I could do not to squeal, 'I am having CRAZY deja vu right now!!' 

No, instead, I made small talk about the warm weather.

I can't remember exactly the other triggers for deja vu that have happened in the last couple of days, but suffice to say, there have been many.

It makes me think. . .what the hell is deja vu anyway?

Is it something simply physical, like a brain hiccup. . .or is it a Jungian-like connection between the waking world and the subconscious mind?

Black Whole

Do you ever get the feeling that you're living in a vacuum?
A place devoid of any life-forms, air, or water except for yourself
(and then, sometimes even your own existence seems questionable)?
Well, I do.
It's something that doesn't happen very often, but when it does, it comes like a single feather floating down from a cloud.

I look up and there it is.
Silence.
No bird in sight, either.

It's at a time exactly like this when I feel that ---wow!--- I can paint a picture, work on a story that I haven't yet finished, experiment with something completely different than my norm,
INCUBATE.